Every day we meet several people at work, in the shops, at the university, in the neighborhood, or at parties and gatherings with whom we communicate and interact. Talking, telling jokes, shaking hands, touching or kissing usually happen in these interactions; but, is a Muslim allowed to do all these with whoever he/she wants? Or is he/she permitted to be exposed to such acts? These and many similar questions are answered in Islam.
To clarify and form the relations among people, Islam has presented the concept of Maharim and the two categories “Mahram” and “non-Mahram” which sometimes serve as conditions, requirements, or the basis of several Islamic laws. Regarding the Islamic rules on marriage, these categories define who a person can and cannot marry. Likewise, when dealing with the Islamic dress code, i.e., explaining whom one must cover specific parts of a body in front of, the concept of Maharim is required.
One’s Mahram is anyone whom it is permanently forbidden to marry because of blood ties, marriage ties or breastfeeding. However, a woman does not need to cover her hair and put on Hijab when she is in their presence. A woman's male Mahrams fall into three categories plus her spouse [1]. Mahrams for a man are derived similarly. The Maharim for both, extracted from the verses of the Holy Quran (4:22-23) and (24:31), are listed below [1], and all other people and relatives are considered as non-Maharams.
Permanent or blood Mahrams, with whom one is Mahram through blood ties:
parents, grandparents, and further ancestors;
siblings;
children, grandchildren, and further descendants;
siblings of parents, grandparents, and further ancestors (cousins and their children are not Mahram);
children and further descendants of siblings;
In-law Mahrams, with whom one becomes Mahram through marriage ties:
father-in-law, mother-in-law;
son-in-law, daughter-in-law;
stepfather (mother's husband) if their marriage is consummated, stepmother (father's wife) even if their marriage is not consummated;
stepson (husband's son) even if their marriage is not consummated, stepdaughter (wife's daughter) if their marriage is consummated[i];
Rada or "milk-suckling Mahrams," with whom one becomes Mahram because of being breastfed by her. When a woman breastfeeds an infant that is not her child for a certain amount of time under certain conditions, she becomes the child's rada mother and everything concerning blood Mahrams apply here, such as rada father/mother, rada sister/brother, rada aunt/uncle and so on. In English, these can be referred to as milk-brother, milk-mother, etc. [ii].
It is forbidden (Haram) to marry Mahrams, but one can marry non-Mahrams who have reached puberty. As explained above, Married couples are Mahram to each other. But unlike other Mahrams, the limitations and rulings on looking and touching do not apply to them; i.e., married couples are the only ones allowed to touch and look at the whole body of one another; even the private parts.
Regarding social interactions, there are some rules according to the concept of Maharim:
Women and men are both required to keep their gazes downcast and should not stare at the other person when facing non-Mahrams or talk to them. Even Mahrams are not allowed to see certain parts of the body of each other (this will be discussed more under a separate topic “the Islamic rules on looking“);
When talking to non-Mahrams, the tone of voice should be serious, and the dialogues should be direct and as much as necessary. One should also avoid telling jokes and laughing loudly [iii];
Any physical contact (i.e., shaking hands, hugging touching) with non-Mahrams is forbidden (haram), except for curing patients. In this case, if a doctor of the same gender as the patient exists and can cure, then it is forbidden to refer to a non-Mahram doctor.
When being sole in a closed room (where no one else can enter, i.e., locked place), it is forbidden for a non-Mahram man to remain alone in the company of a non-Mahram woman. The Prophet of Islam (PBUH&HP) said: “No man is alone with a woman except that Satan is the third one present ” [2];
It is required (Wajib) to cover specific parts of a body in the presence of a non-Mahram according to the Islamic dress code. For men, this includes from navel to knee. For women, the clothing should cover their hair and body, but covering the face and the hands, from the wrist to the fingers, is not mandated [3].
Notes:
[i] sister-in-law and brother-in-law are not Mahram.
[ii] Refer to your source of emulation (Marja’ Taqlid) for more details and the rulings.
[iii] See the article on modesty.
References:
- Mahram and non Mahram
- S. H. al-Amili, “Wasail al-Shia”, vol. 20, p. 131.
- A. Aroussi Howayzi, “Tafsir Noor al-Thaqalayn”, vol. 3/589, T. 105.
Allah almighty has bestowed upon us so many gifts that even if you try your hardest, you cannot count them all:
He gave you all that you had asked Him. If you enumerate Allah’s blessings, you will not be able to count them. Indeed, man is most unfair and ungrateful! (Holy Quran, 14:34)
However, if you reflect further, you will realize that the greatest favor of Allah to us is the opportunity to use these gifts. Life is a priceless blessing that many people often overlook. We must appreciate this precious gift from Allah and use it in the best way possible. Regarding this, Allah Almighty warns us about wasting our time in the Holy Quran,
I swear by Time! * Mankind is indeed in loss, * except those who have faith and do righteous deeds, and enjoin one another to [follow] the truth, and enjoin one another to patience. (103:1-3)
This life is short yet crucial because it’s all we have got. Allah almighty says,
On the Judgement Day, He will gather them [it will be] as if they had not remained [in the world] except for a moment of the day getting acquainted with one another. They are certainly losers who deny the encounter with Allah, and they are not guided. (10:45)
Imam Ali (AS) also states,
Your opportunities pass just like the clouds pass; therefore use the good opportunities. (1)
Those who wasted their time in this world on trivial matters will lament on the Judgement Day:
They are certainly losers who deny the encounter with Allah. When the Judgement Day overtakes them suddenly, they will say, ‘Alas for us, for what we wasted in the world!’ And they will bear their burdens on their backs. Look! Evil is what they bear! (6:31)
Giving the importance of time, Islam has set some principles to make the most efficient use of it
Many of the activities we engage in during the day are unproductive. In the Islamic view, it is crucial to understand the importance of spending time on beneficial things. Imam Sadiq (AS) says,
One of the signs of a good Muslim is that he avoids things that have nothing to do with him (2)
Imam Ali (AS) says:
It is so necessary for one to have a time during the day allocated for self-Assessment so that they could see what they have done during the day and the night that had benefit or damage for them. (3)
Imam Kazim (AS) advised his pupil Hisham:
O Hisham! He is not one of us who doesn’t assess himself every day. (4)
Imam Ali (AS) said,
God bless the one … who sets goals. (5)
Imam Ali (AS) said,
For achieving success, manage your time, and to manage your time, think clearly, and for thinking clearly, hide your secrets. (6)
To effectively manage time the most important thing is to know how to allocate every part of our daily life for something needed. In this regard Imam Kazim (AS) says,
Try to divide your time into four parts: one for praying and talking to Allah, another for work, one for spending time with your friends and trustworthy individuals who let you know about your faults and imperfections and who sincerely love you. The last part is for your lawful pleasures and by this last part, you get ready for the other three parts.
Don’t talk with yourself about poverty or length of lifetime. Because anyone who thinks about poverty will become miserly and anyone who thinks about the length of life will become greedy. Give yourself your share of this world by pleasing yourself with lawful things which don’t harm your character or waste your time. (7)
Imam Ali (AS) said:
Thinking before acting saves you from regretting. (8)
One of the best ways to save time is to think carefully before taking any action. Some people think that acting impulsively leads to faster success. They think that overthinking is a sign of fear, so they advocate for thinking less and acting more. However, Islam doesn’t support this notion as it encourages thoughtful consideration and reflection before taking any action.
In this regard, Imam Ali (AS) said,
Every movement requires knowledge. (9)
Imam Sadiq (AS) also said,
The one who acts without needed insight is like a passenger on the wrong road. The faster he goes, the farther he gets from his destination. (10)
The holy Prophet (PBUH & HP) said:
When you want to do something, think about its results, if it brings benefits or progress, act and if it is harmful or causes regression, refrain from doing it. (11)
We only live this life once, but its consequences will remain in the Hereafter. Don’t squander this opportunity and by making the best of it, secure a better life for yourself in the Hereafter.
Resources
- Nahj al-Balaghah, Sayyed Razi, sayings no.12
- Vasa’il ash-Shia, Sheikh Hurr al-Ameli, vol.12, pg.199
- Ghorar al-Hikam, Amodi, pg.896
- Mustadrak al-Vasa’il, Muhaddith an-Nuri, vol.12, pg.153
- Bihar al-Anvar, Allamah al-Majlesi, vol.75, pg.51
- Nahj al-Balaghah, SAyyed Razi, sayings no.84
- Tohaf al-Uqul, Harrani, pg.409 & 410
- Bihar al-Anvar, Allamah al-Majlesi, vol.68, pg.337
- Tohaf al-Uqul, Harrani, pg.171
- Al-Kafi, Sheikh Koleini, vol.1, pg.43
- Al-Faqih, Sheikh Saduq, vol.4, pg.410 & 411
Ramadan is one of the most important months in the Islamic calendar, during which Muslims perform fasting (Sawm), one of the key practices in the religion of Islam. However, aside from being a month of fasting, Ramadan provides Muslims with the opportunity to engage more in their routine religious activities and have a fuller experience of an Ideal Islamic life. There is more to this month, then, that makes it a special time. Let’s see.
Ramadan is a door that has been opened to get Muslims nearer to Allah and to feel His presence more in their lives. This is the time when Allah forgives most and rains down His blessings more than any other time which can wipe away our sins and mistakes [i]. If we knew the real value of this month and were aware of all its rewards, we would wish every month to be Ramadan, as Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) believed [1].
We are so close to Allah in this month and so occupied with his divine remembrance that no time will be left for us to think or do what is not good for us, or what is against Allah’s command. So the inward and outward evil stay far from us in this month of mercy, and it has been promised by Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) that in Ramadan, “the gates of hell are sealed, and the gates of heaven are wide open, and the devils are chained” [1].
Ramadan begins with mercy, continues to bring forgiveness from Allah and ends in granting our wishes and salvation from what has contaminated our souls [2]. It is a time to think about our past mistakes and to make up for them, to make them right.
One of the prominent attributes of Allah is His excessive forgiveness and mercy which reveals itself manifestly and in a fuller sense in the month of Ramadan. It is as if Allah has held us tightly in His embrace and washed away whatever has separated us from Him, and we would be like a child who has just been born, like a soul united with its source. So, when is a better time to be forgiven than this month? [3].
In this beautiful month, the whole content of the Quran was revealed to the heart of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) in an immediate revelation [ii], [4] & [5]. Therefore, this month can be considered as the birth of the holy Quran [iii], and Muslims celebrate this birth through dedicating more time and attention to this holy book.
Thus, reading the Quran with careful consideration and pondering on its deep meanings is highly recommended during the month of Ramadan and it is considered to be more rewarding, to the extent that reading one verse of the Quran is equaled to reading all of it [iv]& [v]. In the month when Allah is closer to us more than ever, He desires to speak to us through the Quranic words, just as we speak to Him, through our prayers.
There are three nights in this month [vi], called the nights of Qadr [vii], one of which is considered to be the night when Quran was revealed to the heart of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) in an immediate revelation by the Archangel Gabriel. However, we are not sure which of these nights is exactly the night of Qadr. Therefore we commemorate all of these three nights.
According to the Quran: “The Night of Qadr is better than a thousand months”(97:3); in other words, the reward of any good deed in this night is a thousand times more than any other night or occasion [8]. Muslims celebrate this night by staying awake throughout the night until the time of Dawn prayer (Salat al-Fajr), supplicating to Allah and asking for His forgiveness of their past deeds and guidance for their future actions.
The night of “Qadr is a celebration to commemorate the arrival of the final guidance for humans. It is a tribute to the commencement of the message revealed to mankind by their Creator, a message which shows them the way to achieve happiness in both worlds” [8].
Aside from being the night in which our sins are forgiven, according to some narrations (Hadith), the night of Qadr is also the night of our destiny; the night in which our fate in the next year is foreseen by Allah [viii], [9].
Finally, life is too short, and chances are slipping away from your hands like spring clouds [10]. Ramadan is one of these chances, to look back and build a better future. It is a starting point, or shall we say a turning point! So embrace this holy month.
Notes:
[i] Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) said: “The month of Ramadan is the month of Allah, and a month in which Allah highlights the virtues and wipes away the sins, this is the month of blessing” [1].
[ii] It is believed that there are two kinds of revelation for the Quran, the immediate revelation that occurred in one of the nights of Qadr and the gradual revelation which sent down to Prophet Muhammad (PBUH&HP) in the span of twenty-three years of his prophethood [11].
[iii] Imam Baqer (AS) said: “There is a spring for everything, and the spring of Quran is the month of Ramadan”. [6]
[iv] Imam Reza (AS) said: “whoever read a verse of Allah’s book [Quran] in the month of Ramadan, it would be equal to his/her reading of the whole of Quran in other months” [7].
[v] Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) said: “Read Quran abundantly during the month [of Ramadan]” [7].
[vi] 19th, 21st and 23rd of Ramadan.
[vii]. Qadr literally means measure.
[viii]. Note that the concept of destiny or Qadr is not in conflict with human beings freedom of choice in Islam. For more information see Men and Destiney by Murtada Mutahari.
References:
- Bihar al-Anvar, vol.93, p.340, 346 & 348.
- Usul al-Kafi, vol.4, p.67.
- Sheikh al-Sadugh, Amali, p.53.
- (44: 3), (97:1), (2:185)
- For further information, see: Al-Mizan, vol. 8, pp. 130-134; vol. 2, pp. 14-23; vol. 13, pp. 220-221.
- Usul al-Kafi, vol.2, p.360, Hadith no. 10.
- Sheikh al-Sadugh, Fazail al-Ashhar al-Salasah (the benefits of three months), p. 95.
- Ramadan
- Muhammad ibn Hassan Tussi, Tahdib al-Ahkam, vol.4, p.332.
- Imam Ali (AS), Nahj al-Balaghah, wisdom no. 21.
- Shaykh as-Saduq, A Shi'ite Creed, p. 60.