My name is Abdullah Al-Kanadi. I was born in Canada. My family, who were Roman Catholics, raised me as a Roman Catholic until I was 12 years old. I have been Muslim for approximately six years, and I would like to share the story as a new muslim with you.
During my childhood I attended a Catholic religious school. […] The more I learned about my religion, the more I questioned it!
At the tender age of twelve, I decided I would be an atheist in order to punish God. […] My teenage years were filled with misery and loneliness. I was accepted in a local technical school and decided that I should further my education and maybe make some good money, so that I would be happy. […]
I would forget my family and be with my friends all the time. One night, I told my parents I was going to move out. They told me, I couldn’t, and that I wasn’t ready for it and that they wouldn’t allow it! I was 17 years old and very headstrong; I swore at my parents and said to them all sorts of evil things, which I still regret to this day. I felt emboldened by my new freedom. […] I was working and going to school when my roommates introduced me to marijuana. […]Soon though, I started to smoke more and more, until during one weekend I had smoked so much, that it was Monday morning and before I knew it, it was time for school. I thought, well, I’ll take one day of school off, and go the next day. […] I never returned to school after that. I finally realized how good I had it. […] Who needed school anyways?
I was living a great life, or so I thought; I became the ‘resident’ bad boy at work. […]I felt worthless and completely valueless. I was stealing from work and from friends to help maintain the ‘chemical haze’. […] I was beginning to crack and I needed a solution, and I figured that religion would help me.
[…] I bought a couple of books on Wicca and Nature Worship, and found that they encouraged the use of natural drugs, so I continued. People would ask me if I believed in God, and we would have the strangest conversations while under the ‘influence’, but I distinctly remember saying that no, in fact I don’t believe in God at all, I believe in many gods as imperfect as me.
Through all this, there was one friend who stuck by me. He was a ‘Born Again’ Christian and was always preaching to me, even though I would mock his faith at every opportunity. He was the only friend I had at the time who didn’t judge me, so when he invited me along to go to a youth weekend camp I decided to go along. I had no expectations. I thought I would have a huge laugh making fun of all the “Bible Thumpers”. […]They played all sorts of music which praised God. I watched as the young and old, male and female cried out for forgiveness and shed tears over everything. I was really moved and I said a silent prayer along the lines of “God, I know I have been a horrible person, please help me, and forgive me and let me start fresh.” I felt a surge of emotion come over me, and I felt tears roll down my cheek. […]
I returned to my party home and eschewed all drugs, intoxicants, and girls. I promptly told my friends how they needed to be Christians so they could be saved. I was shocked that they rejected me. […]
I started to hang out at a Christian “youth house” which was basically a house where teens could go. […] In spite of this, I felt like a fraud, for I started drinking and dating again. […] Through all this, my one Christian friend would try to council me and keep me on the right track.
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The current of life can drag you to a place you would never think of going. Our fate is not in our hands, although it would seem to be; in its very veins are traces of handprint totally in contrast to ours. I have learned this wonderful truth in my own personal laboratory called life.
My spiritual adventure started when I was a teenager. Worldly life gave me no fulfillment so I turned my head to a different road-“Religion”. I joined the Born-again movement and was very enthusiastic. My passion brought me to full time ministry and I was trained to become a Pastor.
Years went by, the challenges and my personal assessment in the church led me to question my faith. What came after was years spent in struggle that eventually led me to distance myself away from the church and into the worldly life once again. But maybe because I was really searching for fulfillment my craving for spirituality continued. This time I experimented with other religions: Vaisnavism (a branch of Hinduism), new age philosophy, Buddhism then Islam.
What I found in Islam was totally different from what I heard in the news and saw in the movies. I discovered that it is a religion of peace that seeks the betterment of society. The laws and moral codes are there to forge equality, justice, and dignity among the people. Islam dwells more on solving real life issues than ecclesiastical doctrines by providing practical solutions. […] By the guidance of Allah I was able to find one here in Cebu, Alhamdulillah!
Now I am training to become a good Daa’ee (propagator of Islam). The more I read about Islam the more I am falling in love with it. There are more jewels to be discovered as long as we stay focused and look for solutions rather than burying our hands in the mud of negativity. As long as we are determined, we will be successful. Ameen! Ameen! Ameen!
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I am C.S. Mathos. I was born into a secular family on August 1st, 1992, in Pennsylvania. My mom was once a Christian, and as a kid she went to a Quaker church. […]To explain, I was surprisingly logical as a child, and reasoned that it was impossible that a god existed. Really, I didn’t care about religion back then. […]
I was obviously ridiculed when my love for paleontology did not subside. […] When I did speak, I was most often honest, soft spoken, and didn’t have much to say, because I didn’t trust people, and I liked my imagination better than the real world. Even when 9/11’s attacks came, I didn’t talk much, and didn’t react to it. It didn’t scare me at all; I thought the word “Muslim” was the term for an ethnic group[…]When I did come out of my shell (5th grade), I fought with people about religion and politics. I believed there were hypocrisies in Christianity, which was the only religion I remembered at that time.
When I became 13 years old, I really received insults, and took them seriously. […] At that time I wasn’t interested in anything. I decided I needed a religion. I didn’t really search for one, just believed there was one God, and, because of my bitterness, I blamed my problems on Him. […]
I just needed a religion. I tried out Christianity, however I flat out left it. Too many contradictions, sectarianism, and hypocrisy.
I looked around, and around, I looked at everything, from Christianity to Greek Mythology. I decided to look at Islam last, since I took into account the prejudices of war and the possibility that I may actually be killed by someone due to following such a religion. I gave up on everything else, and I said to myself: “The last thing you have to go to is Islam. Just get a Quran and read it. Hell, it may be what you’re looking for.” I got the Quran off of a website and got it in the mail 5 days after it was ordered. It was dark green; so dark green, I thought it was black. It has a beautiful leather binding, gold imprints on it. I started reading it, and I just saw that it was nothing as it was portrayed on TV. I saw that there was only one God, and there was no one else to worship but He. I saw this, and I wanted to join the religion.
[…] I decided that writing down how to pray was for later, conversion was needed for me. I needed to submit to God. NOW. I found the Shahada, and I wrote it down. Then, I took the Shahada, and became a Muslim. As soon as I did, I felt the pain in my heart lifted, and I felt truly happy. God has been good to me, and I try to pray 5 times every day to Him. However, due to the circumstances of war prejudices, other people’s intolerance, and other people’s sectarianism, I have to practice my religion in secret. I pray to God in the morning, noon, sundown, evening, and at 11:00 or 12:00 at night. When I can drive, I’ll drive to the nearest mosque every Friday. My own mother doesn’t even know I’m a Muslim. I’ll tell her when I’m truly ready, or when I’m an adult and live elsewhere, or I’m in college. I pray that God keeps me away from disbelief, and help me become the best Muslim I can be while practicing in secret. If my mom is reading this, try to understand my religion before you pass judgment. Let me practice my religion in peace, without your ridicules and jokes, which are hurtful. I’ve been practicing Islam for a week, I think. I lose track of time.
Non-Muslims that are reading this, I suggest you read the Quran and become a Muslim. Peace be upon you, and God’s blessings.
By C.S. Mathos
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